Heres the link btw if you want to apply: https://www.notion.so/Join-our-Polycule-339ce84f25648043922be9551ed5b846
Wanted: Roommate, must fuck every other housemate
Edit: wow this is a cult lmao
It seems like a big commitment just to save a few bucks on rent
How many people does a group need to become a cult? I don’t think 3 cuts it
A cult with only one member is just an unusual habit. But two? You’ve got a leader and a follower, I think that’s enough.
I would in fact think they must all start that way.
There are single family cults. You can absolutely have a cult with 3 people. It’s all about control.
Such as the Duggars.
And basically anyone in FLDS.
It’s a start
Check “Stolen Youth: Inside the Cult at Sarah Lawrence” - a Hulu documentary series released in 2022.
Warning: heavy shit. Like, seriously. I can take a lot, but this was a hard pill to swallow.
I clicked the link and read the whole thing. I still am not sure if this is sincere or satire. It’s so out there that I kind of hope it is real, and that they find what they are looking for.
My favorite part:
What is your “special move”? *
If you are under 25 & haven’t figured it out yet, you may skip this question.
I was leaning real but intentionally humorous, but then they asked for the applicant’s LinkedIn profile and now I have no idea
I lost my shit at the exemption for outside hookups while on holiday at Burning Man. So specific. 😅
With at least 3 other members of the polycule present!
I liked the bit about having been involved in 5 or more orgies counting as experience.
The breeding pool stuff makes me lean more towards satire
I don’t believe you because the fine print at the bottom specifically says you can’t click the link
OP put the link in the post text
you can’t click the link
Only if you cannot read
the lemmy post text contains the link in clickable (and not shortened) form
It says so
I’ve heard of bananas stories like this over on StrangeÆons channel, so it might very well be real.
You mean the Portland Polycule From Hell? That was determined to be fake unfortunately, someone was just having fun making up stories.
Aww, that’s possible. Though I feel like there’s been plenty of similar stories.
Ive known people in at least three of these. Theres no way to know.
There are so many little things in that link that sends up a little red flag, but this section… Oof.
Family planning:
- We would like to have 3-4 kids.
- We are considering having Melissa breed with Norman or Zaid, and/or Mackenzie with Douglas, as we believe these would be the genetically-optimal combinations. This would likely take place in the next 1-2 years.
- As you would be a newer addition to the polycule, we would need to get to know you for 2-4 years (depending on good behavior) before considering adding you to the gene pool.
Genetically-optimal? How in the fuck do they determine that? What happens if their spawn is not genetically-optimal? Recycling bin?
Geezus fuck people are dumb sometimes.
Genetically-optimal? How in the fuck do they determine that?
Hot and hot = optimal, I’d assume. I haven’t checked the website to see if they have photos of the people or anything.
Ugh it smells very american, who ever talks like that any more? Didn’t you pay attention during WW2? 😬
Nobody did and everyone who tried is long dead.
… Americans don’t talk like the either… What does that even mean
Yeaaaah, that’s not being polyamorous. There’s no amour anywhere near this group. Just somebody (or somebodies) who wants to manipulate a vulnerable victim.
There are plenty of great poly people out there who won’t try to steal your money or control your body.
Yeah 100%. As someone who is a “normal” poly person, the stuff listed in this is awful and terrible and shouldnt ever actually be considered polyamory.
High five from a fellow poly person! 🖐️
Yooo!!! Lets start a cult in Seattle!
I only join cults nowadays if they offer a remote-only option. Tried it out during the pandemic, got used to it, refuse to go back. It’s so much less work.
But how do you distribute the ‘kool-aid’?
Packets in the mail.
Not even who you replied to but If you can help me relocate I am so down :P
Unfortunately, I am not actually in Seattle. Thats just where the original ad is from.
I definitely need to start a polycule cult though where im at. I think I could do it well!
That seems a little redundant
What’s so terrible about long walks on the beach in 3:4 formation??? /j
I’m more of a 4:3 guy
Poly as in plastic.
Life in plastic, its fantastic.
It’s Norman, who will absolutely give up the presidency, but right now is bad timing.
Just another 6 or 7 years and then another person can be at the top of the hierarchy. (This was said 6-7 years ago)
Reminds me of the Final Fantasy house.
I should note: this is NOT me.
Found the defector
Come on, “polyrule” was right there
DAMMIT!
“We are considering having Melissa breed with Norman or Zaid, and/or Mackenzie with Douglas, as we believe these would be the genetically-optimal combinations. This would likely take place in the next 1-2 years.”
Wow, I think this just found the field of microeugenics
The dark arts have practiced by meddling mothers for centuries!
%100 cult vibes. cosmic horror lets gooooo
Yeah, I know when a polycule is looking for a short member they can lift up to get the cookie jar & high shelf stuff.
5’5" is about the global average, it’s not short.
You are right, I was trying to reference this in a petty attempt at humour
Ah I see, I wasn’t familiar :)
Maybe if you’re including children.
edit: Apparently not: https://compareheight.net/average-human-height-worldwide/
Oh, they are looking for a tall gf then.
I’m not poly, but $1,500 is pretty cheap rent for San Francisco…
Are you sexually compatible with all genders in their cule?
FAFO now has a new meaning!
Jesus I was just thinking the opposite. I would be OK with poly if it meant saving on rent but 1500 is fucking ridiculous (and I’m thinking Canadian). Even coming from the most expensive rent in Canada, that’s way too fucking much to also be dealing with weird “breeders”.
I pay 16 for a closet. California is wild.
Well if they’re walking 3:4 there’s 12 people in said polycule so total rent would be $18 840 which… doesn’t seem particularly cheap.
E: Haha ok so if they meant 3+4 then ‘3:4’ is the absolute worst way of writing that. And that’s still $11 000 a month.
House is 4 bedrooms, group is 7 people. (Three pairs share a room at least.)
There’s 7, including the applicant. They meant 3, then 4.
They mean a line of 3 and another of 4 people wide formation. They wish to be exactly 7 people
My favorite part is that you can’t fuck anyone outside the polycule, except at burning man 🤣
I’d need more information before I could say I wanted to be in their polycule, much less their breeding pool.
I’m happy with my monocule. Every couch feels like an XL couch when you’re by yourself
✊
I don’t understand this post. All I see are red flags.
That means you DO understand the post.
If this was Portland I’d be sure it’s a joke, but SF? who could say
“You can’t click on this link because it is on printed paper, you will need to type it into your browser”.
That got me chuckling, because I have actually tried to do that multiple times, but only succeeded twice.
