Another German banger I heard awhile ago:
“Ask me if I’m a schoolbus.”
“Are you a schoolbus?”
“No.”
So German humor is anti-meme?
it is post modern
german humor is no laughing matter
But is also the wurst.
Modern.
It’s so derived
Hey now, the Germans take humour very seriously! It’s no laughing matter.
I think this forklift training video is pretty funny
Not Safe For Mental Health.
but safe for work fingerguns pew pew
it’s been a while. i can’t remember if SFK survives or not
Spoiler
No, he drives into the sunset without head
I first saw this video when getting my forklift license, lol. It being an official instruction video somehow makes it better.
So there are actually some German wartime jokes that are actually quite funny. Here’s some that I heard:
- " Where I live there’s now a lot of warehouses, there were houses and there were houses, and there were houses!"
- “How can you tell an optimist from a pessimist? The optimist is learning English and the pessimist is learning Russian.”
- One day at the barracks there was a soldier on his knees looking around the ground, picking up random papers he found and going “no, no that’s not it”. His officer asked what he was doing, “I’m looking for my special paper”. He sent him to the doctor and he was declared insane, when the doctor gave him his discharge papers he explained “ah, there’s my special paper!”
How would a German joke work based on english homonyms?
So I went and googled it out of curiosity, after remembering that German for was/were (in some form anyway) is ‘war’.
I found this in a thread about Downfall and a translated joke where someone was wondering what the original was:
The German pun uses ‘Warenhaus’ department store and “Da war 'n Haus” - “there was/used to be a house”.
hm thanks
English and German derive from a common root language, so I’d honestly be surprised if there weren’t some that do.
Germans hate humor so much that hey renamed “The Simpsons” to “Die Simpsons!”. “Die Simpsons!”!!
Die Bart, Die!
Noone who speaks German can be an evil man. Parole granted!
these are wunderbar
These are gold, thank you for posting
Knock knock
Who’s there?
WE ARE ZE ONES WHO ASK ZE QVESTIONS!
Protection from what? Ze Germans?
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, they are an efficient people and lack a strong sense of humor
Poor lighting is no laughing matter.
Zero. Efficient germans use efficient LED.
LED bulbs still exist and are more efficient to use than LED fixtures where you have to change the entire lamp instead of a bulb!
In fact, I’ve got a room with six such fixtures and only one still works.
The LED bulbs barely die. I am still using first gen bulbs i bought over a decade ago. I’ve only had 1 die on me so far. Versus the monthly replacement of some heat bulbs and always having a box of spares around.
Changing lightbulbs is kind of a thing from the past. Old fashioned fillament heat bulbs are hardly in use in Germany nowadays.
What? Do lightbulbs get stuck if you tell a joke?
You must be German
Probably partly. My last name is a German name, but I think we’re more Eastern European muts. I’ve never really gotten a clear answer.
I’ve met many funny germans, and then 1 german guy who so perfectly fits the stereotype that I almost think its a bit in its own right.
German jokes are the wurst
German humor is no laughing matter.
I read that as it was gay (as in happy) until they walked in.
Thank you. I’d have spent ages thinking about how that could possibly be funny.
Zwei Kamele sitzen im Keller und hacken Petroleum. Sagt das eine zum anderen: “Du, morgen ist Weihnachen!”. Sagt das andere: “Ich weiß, ich bin eh mit dem Fahrrad da.”
Sitzen zwei Kamele im Keller und stricken Benzin. Kommt ein Schraubenzieher, läuft ein mal den Türrahmen hoch und wieder herunter und verschwindet wieder. Fragt das eine Kamel: “Du, hast du dat geseh’n?” Sagt das andere Kamel: “Jau, der is öfter hier.”
Ich lerne noch Deutsch und kann den Witz zwar übersetzen aber ich verstehe er trotzdem nicht.
Edit: Grammar
There is a trope of nonsensically combining statements, e.g. “at night it’s colder than outside” (it’s called Alogismus - is alogism a proper english word?). It’s children humor, most of them find it funny somewhere between 6 and 14 yo.
This sentence is an example of that:
- camels don’t sit in basements
- you can’t chop kerosene
- Christmas has nothing to do with the fact that the camel traveled via bicycle
Ach so! ich verstehe jetzt. Yeah the cultural immersion is still a bit far in my German learning journey. Aber danke dir :)
Gerne! :-)
Hä?
Rollt ein Keks um die Ecke und fällt um. Was fehlt?
Tap for spoiler
Der Witz
Diese Art von Witzen die mit skurrilen Szenarien und Dialogen gearbeitet haben waren im Deutschsprachigen Raum in den 70ern angesagt - Ein bisschen vor meiner Zeit, aber man hat ja Eltern und Verwandte, und der hat sich in meiner Kindheit in mein Hirn gebrannt.
Yeah but what does it mean!? 😂
It’s somewhat of an antijoke. Translation would be:
Two camels are sitting in a cellar chopping petroleum. One of them says: “Tomorrow is Christmas, you know?”. The other one replies: “Yeah, I came here by bike anyways”
The whole joke is based on subverting expectations. You don’t expect camels sitting in a cellar, a liquid can’t be chopped, camels can’t speak (and wouldn’t care about christmas either), camels don’t ride bikes, and noone chooses a bike as a mode of travel especially in expectation of Christmas.
I personally never found it that funny, but my mother was laughing as if it were the funniest thing ever said.
Thanks! I’ll take it. I like surreal and it doesn’t land for me but I’m glad my attempts to translate weren’t butchered…
What are the odds ich_iel starts posting these to screw with people.
That joke only works in German because “treffen” has two meanings: meet and hit.
Ah so kind of like “a man walks into a bar and says ouch”
Yea same as “c’est l’histoire d’un gars qui rentre dans un café… et plouf”
MAYBE YOU ARE ALL HOMOSEXUALS!
Gottseidank heißt unser Führer nicht Kräuter. Sonst hieße es den ganzen Tag Heilkräuter! Heilkräuter!
Karl Valentin
German humor is usually not funny and a bit mean.
The Dutch have compensated for their neighbors with an over-developed sense of humor.
i have a dutch friend whose favorite joke is:
Person 1: knock knock
Person 2: who’s there
Person 1: interrupting cow
Person 2: interrupting cow who?
Person 1: …dammitmine is:
two pretzels were walking down the street. one was assaulted. pretzel.
(it’s funnier if you tell it in a silly voice)I don’t get either joke TT_TT
okay so thinking about jokes and getting them can make them funnier, having someone explain them always makes them worse. see below
the first one (edited for those unfamiliar with the format), we were trying to teach him knock knock jokes. because they are stupid. he loves the interrupting cow one, but what he loves even better is fucking up the interrupting cow one. and mine is a pun on salted pretzels but it’s REALLY BAD
This whole thread is making me cry laugh
what is belgian humor like?
Same as the rest of France
As far as we Flemish know, humor in Wallonia is non-existent
thats very dutch of the flemish and very french of the wallons
Maybe you’ll recognize some of the titles on here.
Some puns inevitably get lost in translation, though.Haven’t been there yet so I don’t know. I’ll go find out if you want to sponsor me.
German humor is fine, but much of german humor does not translate well, because it is often using puns, homophones, double entendrse or subversion of expectations, and you have to actively listen - just hearing without paying attention might result in not even realizing a joke was made. And I wouldn’t say it’s mean, but it is often dark and hitting where it really hurts regarding whatever goes wrong in society. I heard once that people start laughing if they can’t bear the pain anymore, and a lot of german humor fits this saying well.
I completely disagree. The people I meet in my daily life have a very healthy sense of humour, not mean at all. And in popular media? Look at Loriot, Sebastian Pufpaff, Hazel Brugger (sure, she’s Swiss, but hugely popular in Germany), Anke Engelke and Bastian Pastewka, Ladykracher in general…
How long have you lived in Germany?
