Drop names immediately please.

Ya, but it’s REALLY important to that person that YOU know that they are morally superior to you.

What kind of art do you do?

I was slightly intoxicated for large parts of the evening, but the one that jumps to mind is I was going to say I was the founder/CEO of a startup specializing in dog euthanasia to help reduce labor costs at kill shelters. We’re in talk to be bought out by Google right now.

The funny thing, is that my wife had just been laid off from the company she worked for that paid for this, but the tickets and travel were already paid for, so we just went anyway. It was beautiful, because there would have been zero ramifications for pissing off the entire room full of suits.

That hack Torvalds keeps denying my pull request to implement /dev/aether which would immediately begin overwriting the entire disk and all other mounted storage with the repeating content of whatever is moved there.

There is nothing in /dev/null, and no man needs nothing.

That’s how I want to go out.

That’s actually a form of puss comprised mostly of white blood cells and would be indicative of a pretty ripping bacterial infection.

But women get boobs that they can touch literally whenever they want to, so they win anyway. Also, who can do better? It’s not actually clear from the context.

Technically, it would be ‘vaginal fluid’ or ‘vaginal excretion’

That was obviously the extreme example of the concept taken to its limit, I was hoping you would follow me on the whole length of the walk. How about the example of starting false rumors and such about them? How about the fact that what you’re talking about is illegal in and of itself? Playing dirty is immensely gratifying, and satisfying on a visceral level; I’m not trying to pretend that it isn’t. I don’t like it either, but it is their legal right to have that. The whole reason we don’t like them is that they lack the moral restraint that usually develops sometime around middle school, and the importance of which I’m trying to instill. I could write a whole book based around the thesis that the primary difference between the two ideologies, is the importance that one places on delayed gratification, but I’m typing on my phone right now…

War would be a lot easier if we chose to do away with pesky restrictions like the Geneva convention, but would you be proud to be on the side that dropped white phosphorus on an elementary school to win? Would you prefer that we start making up lies and false rumors about Trump and Co? Restraint is difficult; I understand that, put the resulting clean victory is the most lasting kind.

We are not them.

What did you do?

Somebody needs to make one of these about Gerber.

What is a celt?

Mmmmm… Bathe me in the warmth of your rage stemming from your objectively incorrect opinions…

Real talk though, I appreciate that it’s popular, and I may simply have not watched enough of it, but the dozen or so random episodes I’ve seen just never really bit me.

Tell us about the Dust Bowl again Grandpa!

FACT CHECK: Actually, Squidbillies is good, Aquateen Hunger Force is the bad show.

I checked. It’s still enabled.