In the Wizard of Oz, Glenda the “Good” Witch is actually a ruthless drug kingpin.

She used her magic powers to summon a tornado and then merks the Wicked Witch of the East with Dorothy’s house. She then puts WWotE’s shoes on Dorothy in order to make her a target for WWotE’s sister, the Wicked Witch of the West. Glenda then uses Dorothy as a stooge to bump off WWotW, thereby putting herself in control of Oz’s vast fields of opium poppies, and cornering the entire opium trade.

It doesn’t make sense any other way. Glenda could have told Dorothy to use the ruby slippers to get home at literally any point, but instead sends her on a wild goose chase, and uses her as a blunt instrument to take out the only other bases of power remaining in Oz: the WWotW, and the Wizard, who Dorothy exposes as a fraud. Only then does she tell Dorothy to click her heels, and poof: everything is all wrapped up with a bow, and Glenda’s hands are clean. Her two main rivals are dead, and the Wizard is fleeing Oz in disgrace.

It’s some fucking Kaiser Söze level shit.

My knee pain is associated with arthritis, unfortunately. I wish stretching helped. I’m even a couple years younger than OP, but when I walk up stairs it sounds like I’m crinkling two big balls of cellophane.

I could still do without the knee pain though.

Sounds like someone is trying to immanentize the eschaton.

“Fascism should rightly be called Corporatism, as it is the merger of corporate and government power.” - Benito Mussolini

If we’re going to be running minor celebrities for the Irish presidency, the only real choice is Blindboy Boatclub.

He’s taken many too many blows to the head. Listen to interviews with him early in his career and compare them to his interviews now. The level of brain damage he’s endured is pretty obvious.

That’s just Melanie Scrofano.

I’m surprised nobody has done a modern TV version. All five books have been successfully adapted for radio, the scripts are done, it’s already blocked out into well-paced individual episodes. It’s just sitting there waiting to be made. You just need a good cast and a show runner who isn’t going to monkey with the source material. It’s already proven to be popular and long-lived. Seems like a no-brainer.

The thing that’s going to stick with me forever about this conflict is the accounts from the doctors working in Gaza describing all the small children who died from a single rifle shot to the head or heart. I just can’t imagine what has to die inside of you before you can sit behind a rifle scope, specifically pick out a child, and then murder them for funsies.

The correct answer is chile verde and cheddar cheese. I don’t care if you need to eat it with a fork, it’s what happiness tastes like.

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Ulysses is a rough one. There are some novels that are so dense that you have to have already read it through once before you can really read it for the first time. I think Ulysses might take three or four.

I started reading it after hearing Robert Anton Wilson talk at length about why he loved the book. He made it sound amazing. And having read it, and read about it, I get why the people who love it really love it. It’s a meticulously crafted, ultra dense, heavily embroidered, masterwork of English literature. You can spend years and years reading and re-reading the book, picking apart layer after layer, and still find new elements to explore, and new threads to pull, which still all end up being perfectly internally consistent. It’s really an amazing literary achievement.

But it fucking sucks to read for the first time.

You need like a companion reference book, the Internet, a French to English dictionary for one of the chapters, and a map of Dublin. It’s not entertainment; it’s a project. And honestly, I’ve found it a lot more interesting to listen to Ulysses experts explaining the book than it is to actually read the book itself.

At my high school we had a teacher who had an advanced degree in Shakespeare studies, and she would teach a different play every quarter. They were great classes, but a single quarter was plenty of time for a very comprehensive look at each play. I can’t imagine stretching it out over an entire year and have it be anything but absolutely tedious.

Look, my coke habit isn’t a problem. Just shut up and help me cover the windows with this aluminum foil. It’s the only thing that blocks the surveillance rays from the FBI agents that are hiding in the rosebushes. And watch out for the neighbor’s dog. I’m pretty sure he’s working with them.

Brian and Bob were walking through the forest when they came across a set of tracks.

“Those are cougar tracks!” Bob exclaimed.

“Hell, no! Those are coyote tracks.” Brain said.

“I’m tellin’ you, I’ve been out in these woods since I was little, and those are cougar tracks!”

“There’s no cougars in this part of the country. Those are coyote tracks!”

Then they both got hit by a train.

You do have the benefit of being right though.

The word octopus is a classical Greek word that comes to English via Latin. The Greek plural is octopodes, the Latin plural is octopi. But we don’t speak Latin or classical Greek. We speak English. Because octopus is the English word for octopus it follows the English rules for pluralization, which is to add “s” or “es” to the end of the word. Cases can be made why octopi and octopodes could be technically correct, but for English speakers octopuses is the most correct.

The thing I’ve always loved about the Labor party is how they really set themselves apart from the Tories. I mean, it’s just night and day. Really makes you feel like things are going to change for the better. So inspiring.

From the Wikipedia article:

“Early chiropractors believed that all disease was caused by interruptions in the flow of innate intelligence, a vitalistic nervous energy or life force that represented God’s presence in man; chiropractic leaders often invoked religious imagery and moral traditions. D. D. Palmer said he ‘received chiropractic from the other world’. D. D. and B. J. [Palmer] both seriously considered declaring chiropractic a religion, which might have provided legal protection under the U.S. constitution, but decided against it partly to avoid confusion with Christian Science.”*

Why would a chiropractor tell you that? Nobody selling you a quack remedy is going to just come out and tell you it’s quack remedy. That’s rule #1 of selling quack remedies. But the history of chiropractics isn’t a secret, Neither are the statistics on vertebral artery dissection and other injuries caused by chiropractic adjustments. But look, I’m not your mommy. You don’t have to believe me, and you’re free to go do what you feel. It’s your own neck you’re risking.

For people who don’t know, the theory of chiropractics is that the light of God somehow shines into the human body through the top of the head, travels down the spine, and on through the nerves. If you can just fix any blockages (aka “subluxations”) in that flow then it will be impossible for disease to exist in the body. Because God’s light.

The founder of chiropractics was told this information by a ghost.

I know some people swear by chiropractic adjustments, but this is information I wish I’d known when I had my back injury because going to a chiropractor set my recovery back by at least three years. And the money I lost to that quack could have paid for not only the legit physical therapist that actually got me feeling better, but probably a decent massage chair too.