And as you sit there deep in thought you feel something tickle your nethers, you think little of it at first but as soon as you feel it again you shift your position and look down. At the same moment your mind comprehends that it’s the hand of an otter, that very hand grabs ahold of your dangling valuables and pulls. You are never seen again.
It’s so stupidly ugly that I’m unsure if this post is sarcastic or not.