There’s three hamsters running on a wheel in shifts up in my skull.

CNN seems to be under the misbelief that I want to live longer. 46 is already too long.

Well given the low likelihood that any of them have intelligent life the fact that you’re able to ask means the chances are probably 100%

There’s a bunch that turn out to be idiots just regurgitating the description of a creature they recently saw in a movie.

I guess washing stainless steel is against their religion.

Existence. It’s also a paradox because without existence it’s impossible to be either evil or necessary.

I don’t discern between polite and impolite society, it’s demeaning. Therefore I’ll use “Jesus fuck” regardless of situation, with very few exceptions on a per diem basis.

TIL that the Dom Guy’s name is Jeremy, apparently.

It’s a place where men are men and pigs are nervous.

Hamsters? I didn’t know y’all enough to trust you with cats or dogs outright.

It wouldn’t help, there’s an unstoppable army of fuckheads that blindly vote Republican no matter who it is. At this point I’ve just given up entirely.

It really needs more trees, dang.

My chromosomes. The X and Y work together in semi-functional unison to make me the man I am today.

Also it’s makes their metaphorical dicks hard. Maybe their literal dicks too, idk.

I mean with the Borg, genocide really is the only option. I think it’s stupid that nobody ever bothered to just build a fleet of piloted, cloaked warp missiles. The pilots don’t even need to die, they can be in warp-capable shuttles that detach from the stealth missiles, leaving them to saturation-slam into every piece of Borg bullshit in system at warp 9.

Trump doesn’t listen to your prayers, fuckheads.

This is hardly the least scientific anything cops do.

Because it’s a lesson they’ll never forget lol

The secret 3½ stage?