Hi! I’m currently in a straight relationship and have always considered myself extra straight (guys are just not attractive).
However, a very long time ago, I was possibly sexually assaulted by a man (drugged, hung out in his room). I say possibly because I wanted him in that moment, and we tried to fuck each other but had issues getting it up (too many drugs I guess).
I’ve been fantasizing about it on and off ever since. The only person I’ve ever told was my therapist recently. He suggested I be open and avoid shaming myself (so maybe that’s part of this post). Something about being inside someone’s ass while they cum all over themselves, or someone inside me while I cum, is just very arousing.
I know I need to come out to my partner. First, though, I’d like to have a plan to deal with this fantasy. Are there healthy ways to explore this possible facet of my sexuality without, ya know, cheating?
If you get turned on by the thought of a dude banging you in the butt, congratulations, you’re gay. Your therapist is right, stop shaming yourself.
How to do it without cheating? Don’t do it unless your girl is cool with it, or don’t be with her. Simple as.
He’s in the process of (maybe) coming out as bisexual.
I don’t think you meant it that way, but bi guys especially have to deal with everyone assuming they’re closeted homosexuals. So when you say “you’re gay” it’s inaccurate and a little hurtful.
On the flip side, bi women struggle with everyone assuming they’re just “experimenting” and are actually straight.