Not to worry, I’m convinced you’re a good fren everyone wants to hang out with. Goblin-ness not mandatory.

But do you pile and hoard stuff, do you like to sit in a mound of blankets, do you eat stuff indiscriminately? All of that matters…

I have not owned or worn sweatpants for three decades but everything else applies to me. Am I unknowingly a goblin?

14 years ago when I was still relatively young and liked clubbing, a song popped up and swept all the playlists in my country. Clubs, radio stations, you name it. Catchy French song. It came and went so fast that I didn’t manage to memorise it. That was long before I even dreamed of having a smartphone. When I moved to UK a year later, nobody had any idea what song I’m trying to describe, like they never heard it.

Probably around 8 years ago I was roaming the streets of Porto with my ex, and a shop we passed had the song blasting from the speakers. Praise the smartphones, I used ‘what’s the song’ app and et voila: Stromae - alors on danse

I googled Yanni and that’s what I got

I got no sources to back it up but I’ve taken that as a fact for very long time: the symbol for Mars (male/masculine) is a shield and a spear. The symbol for Venus (female/feminine) is a handheld mirror, that cross under the circle is the handle.

Cats are liquid. You think you put an orange ON a cat, but it ends up IN a cat. Just the state of matter

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