I think I got a crush on my dance instructor. Which fucking sucks for all the obvious reasons. Normally I wouldn’t be so worried. BUT I JUST HAD A GODDAMN ROMANTIC DREAM ABOUT HER. Seriously I just woke up from a dream about her confessing her love to me and me eagerly doing the same about her.

So how do you stop a crush from developing further? Because this is a well from which only disappointment may be drawn.

Edit: I am single btw.

  • Andy@slrpnk.net
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    10 months ago

    Try actively steering your fantasy past the peak of infatuation and into the latter stages of a relationship and on to breakup.

    Right now, you have intrusive thoughts about falling in love with them, and probably the excitement of getting to know someone intimately. Instead of trying to hold back, let that fantasy play out in your head further. Imagine moving in, imagine them not getting you when you’re explaining your problems. Imagine liking them, but finding their bad habits increasingly intolerable, and never being able to pick a movie to watch. Imagine them not flushing the toilet and clogging the shower drain with hair. And then imagine meeting someone new, and feeling guilty about crushing had on them. Imagine this new person reciprocates, and imagine politely explaining to your dance instructor that you guys can stay friends but, the romance has run it’s course.

    And there you are. The itch is scratched, and in your mind they’re just a friend again.

  • Usernameblankface@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    In my experience, get to know the person, as a person. I see the crush as a separate entity from myself. The crush sees them as some unrealistic ideal superhuman, which falls apart when I take time to find out who the actual person is.

    This assumes you have opportunities to casually chat without planning time specifically, or you can be in a regular part of group conversations.

    • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      10 months ago

      I had a crush and had this like, idea* of who they might be.

      Got to know them more and more, and… they’re exactly the person my imagination fabricated.

      Anyway, we’re married and shit now. I wish the same for every person with a crush.