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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: July 2nd, 2023

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  • That’s weird that you’ll axle and water pump are needing to be replaced before 100k. You might want to get a second opinion from a small business mechanic. It sounds like the boot on your axle might be leaking and a smaller mechanic might be willing to replace that rather than replace the whole axle. If it’s not knocking the your axle should still be fine but if you don’t ateast refill the grease in the boots it’ll fail eventually. As for the water pump, I have to wonder what makes them think it’s failing.





  • Kaiyoto@lemmy.worldtoAsk Lemmy@lemmy.worldIs "retard" a slur?
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    2 months ago

    I grew up using this word all the time. It’s just one of the dumb words we said all the time. I only found out within the last couple of years that it’s considered a slur. Idk, I feel most people who are actually considered retarded and are competent enough to understand don’t actually care. But the reality is that any sort of “name calling” isn’t necessary. I grew up with a culture of all sorts of name calling, but just because I grew up with doesn’t mean it’s right.

    But ultimately, language and the world changes and it’s just not acceptable to say anymore because it is derogatory towards a particular group.


  • I’m sorry you have to deal with this. I’ve got a sister that blows up once in a while and has a lot of mental issues. We grew up with my mom being mentally and emotionally abusive. My sister ended hard getting into drugs and alcohol for a while, spent some time in jail, got bailed out a couple of times. When I started feeling scared after she showed up at my house, drugged out of her mind, and threatened to kick my ass. I went no contact with her.

    There was nothing that any of my family could say to her to get her to stop. She is one of those people who has to learn the hard way. Eventually I started talking to her again when she stopped with the drugs and alcohol (she still smokes pot but it doesn’t cause issues other than not affording to pay her bills). She doesn’t make any effort to apply herself or make any real improvements in her life. I’ve talked with her a lot about improving her self Esteem and doing tiny things to get out of a vicious cycle of depression. I’ll follow up with her and ask if she did any of it and she’ll say no. She’s taken medication for her depression and whatever other issues she has, but she’ll stop taking it. She won’t see a therapist because she is paranoid that idk they’ll call the cops or tell the government something about her. (My mother was psycho paranoid the same way.)

    I’m not entirely sure what got her out of the drugs and alcohol. But at some point she decided to stop, then she had a baby and that’s been her primary motivation for staying clean at least. She recently checked herself into a psych ward after a blow up with her husband and child and she became suicidal. She’s convinced she isn’t worth anything and is just a fuck up.

    But I guess the point I’m making is that people have to choose to change. My sister will have to choose to make changes in her thinking if she wants to be happy and functional, just like she chose to stop drugs and alcohol. The best thing is probably go no contact. Some people will use that as a sign that they need to stop and figure their shit out or get help. It wouldn’t hurt to tell him you care about him, that you hope for the best for him, that you wish him a good life (maybe by mail is best). That’s if you still do. Maybe those words will stick with him.



  • Learn how to learn. Having the ability to look up things on the internet, watch YouTube videos, go to the library and find books, ask people for help and even show you how to do something. Most people are willing to teach others if you’re willing to learn.

    I wouldn’t necessarily recommend it unless you feel comfortable with it but sometimes money is tight and it’s easier just to replace that 10$ part rather than call a repair guy. I’ve looked up how to replace a part on a water heater on the internet because it was cheap at Lowes and I didn’t want to pay weekends rates for the plumber.

    Also learn how to do basic things like learn how to change the oil on your car, replace your belts and change a tire. You’ll save some money and feel good about being able to do these little things. Look for tools at yard sales and pawn shops if you don’t have a lot to spend on tools.